Normal Day

Hugs and Blessings to Everyone,

Sorry I have not written for a while, I was getting very home sick so I told Bill that he had to write and for a few days I just did not feel like writing.  Please accept my apologies.

I am going to give you a look at a normal day:

5:45 Bill wakes up (Karen sleeps)
6:00 Bill attempts to wake boys
6:15 Most boys up, Bill attempts to wake the rest
6:45 Bill tells whoever is still sleeping he is leaving in 15 minutes
7:00 Bill leaves for Colleges & Universities with whoever is in the van
7:00 - 8:30 Karen gets her lazy butt out of bed
7:45 Bill gets home from dropping off boys
7:45-9:00 Bill and Karen quiet time to drink coffee, talk and read Bibles
9:00 -2:00ish We run errands, look around, have a leisurely breakfast.  Help make soup or borsch
2:00-3:00 Hang with boys
3:00 Bill goes and get kids for English class
3:20-4:20 English
4:20-5:15 Bill runs English kids to bus stop, Karen starts cooking with one of the boys.
5:15-6:00 We all hang out
6:00-9:00ish Depending on the day the boys are at; Friends Club, Youth Church, Prayer meeting or regular church.

If we take the boys to their function, Bill and I will go eat, or just grab a drink until it is time to pick up the boys.

If Andrey takes the boys, we might go out to eat or we watch some T.V shows that we downloaded.

This is the basics of what happens each day, what I did not put in here is all the other stuff that happens.  Someone needs to go to the Doctor, a special meal needs to be prepared, a meeting no one told us about until that day etc....... There are so many numerous things that can happen in a day at a moments notice, it becomes exhausting.

So, some thoughts that I have been having.

Before Bill and I got to the Ukraine I had all the wonderful ideas that we would be able come here and help all the boys and the house parents to..........I guess to become more Americanized.   But, since we have been here I keep waffling back and forth.  Do they really need to be like us if they are happy with the way things are for them now.

We (U.S. people) think that everyone should eat like us.  The way we hold our silverware to the way we drink liquids.  Everyone here, which includes adults and younger people; slurping soup, tea, anything liquid and the slurping is not just a little bit like we would do when something is hot, it is down and out loud, loud slurping.  Can you imagine how it is at a table with 7 people that slurp everything?  It kind of grates on the nerves.  We have been trying to get the boys to not slurp, but holy cow they just do not get it.  Then when houseparent Andrey is eating with us, he slurps as well and we do not have the right to tell him in front of the boys to not slurp.  One thing I do not know is if the girls slurp also.  If so, why do they need to change?

Most people that we have seen eat with their fork in the left hand, knife in the right.  But the silverware is upside-down from the way we hold it.  We talked to the boys about holding the silverware our way, but when we go out to eat we see that everyone seems to eat this way.  Do they need to change?

I am having a hard time getting my deep thoughts down.  I will keep trying.  The boys are understanding the changes of regular house routine (cleaning, cooking etc..) but the mental change is very hard.  It seems that a lot of the orphans and poor people have the attitude that there is nothing better for them, so they will just accept things while everything is good, and when it gets bad - well that is what was going to happen anyway.  I would love for them to understand that if they have a smile on their face and work hard they can advance.

I think the reason that most of the boys have bad grades at the Colleges and Universities is that they don't think there is any hope for a future in that field anyway, so why try?  I do not think all the boys are stupid just because they are getting bad grades.  They just have no drive.  So how do you instill drive into boys that are 16-21?  Unfortunately a lot of the orphans are very lazy due to the fact that they never had to do anything for themselves during the learning years.  This is a very hard habit to break.  They are also very, very manipulative.  If you have ever had a family member that was a drug addict or alcoholic you will understand the kind of manipulation that is going on.  They are sweet and smiley, but this is how they get what they want.

We have learned that people here can advance in a job just by skill alone.  They do not necessarily need a degree.  So if we can encourage a natural skill in each child, could they not find a small job in that field that could possibly lead to more opportunities?  Something to think about.

It is hard to get across to the boys that they are valuable no matter what society says.  Very, very frustrating.

We're leaving for Odessa tomorrow.  Bill and I are ready for a break.  We'll try to write from there.

God Bless,
Karen